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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Private Placements Analyst jobs? · Latest report #gghf2d3x
Your job has an expiration date
December 16, 2027
In 14 monthsRaising capital for companies that have no revenue is adorable.
Junior modeler of imaginary profits and PowerPoint perfectionist.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Capital raising at the speed of light.
oof.you▸ CAPTABLE-BOT X1▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
projects perfect returns for zero revenue ventures
You build pitch decks and model cash flows for companies that barely exist. The machine does it instantly.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie to a client about market sentiment with a straight face.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Vision models instantly format your pitch decks using company data.
Month 3
Smart crawlers audit all due diligence documents without human eyes.
Month 6
AI scouts institutional interest far faster than your cold calls.
Month 10
Cloud agents build your cash flow models with zero errors.
Month 14 · D-Day
Your access expires as the system handles all capital raises.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.3%
99%
Pitch decks ignored
12000
Slide deck templates
4 Liters
Coffee consumed per deal
Your severance
One free subscription to a premium stock screener.
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