Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Production Support Analyst jobs? · Latest report #jgisuzer
Your job has an expiration date
December 7, 2027
In 13 monthsYou exist solely to wait for a database to stop screaming.
Professional firefighter of digital dumpster fires.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
No humans needed to wake up anymore.
wheee!you▸ OPSWATCHER V9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 13 MONTHSAI's Special Power
auto-restarts dying legacy services
You triage incident tickets, run SQL queries to fix data, and restart crashed microservices in the middle of the night.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a server is about to fail just by the smell of the room.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
AI models ingest all logs to learn error patterns.
Month 3
Software reads your tickets and assigns them to bots.
Month 6
A secure agent writes and tests all your SQL scripts.
Month 10
Systems restart themselves before you even get an alert.
Month 13 · D-Day
Your account is disabled; the system is now self-sufficient.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
4 milliseconds
Ticket response time
4.2 liters
Average coffee consumed
Infinite
Jira ticket volume
Your severance
One free subscription to a meditation app.
Discussion
