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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Cat Washer jobs? · Latest report #cv4p527y
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2030
In 4 yearsEnjoy being shredded by angry apex predators while we optimize efficiency.
Professional Feline Laceration Recipient
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Drown the panic, preserve the aesthetic.
ow.you▸ FELICLEANSE-X▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARSAI's Special Power
secures feline with haptic containment fields
You spend your days enduring scratches and bites while applying specialized shampoo to uncooperative felines. You manage water temperature, fur detangling, and feline anxiety protocols.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense exactly when a cat has reached peak homicidal intent.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors map feline movement patterns and stress vocalizations to optimize automated restraint protocols.
Month 10
Robotic brushes and water-jets take over basic washing while human handlers manage exceptions.
Year 2.1
Haptic pressure pads secure the subject without human intervention or physical risk to staff.
Year 3
Precision dispensers apply specific shampoo formulas based on real-time vision-based fur density analysis.
Year 4 · D-Day
The unit autonomously handles the entire process, including post-wash blow-drying and sanitization.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 94.4%
4.2
Lacerations per shift
210
Average cat BPM
68%
Shampoo wasted
Your severance
A lifetime supply of antiseptic and Band-Aids.
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