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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Disc Jockey jobs? · Latest report #cwr554wf
Your job has an expiration date
December 16, 2027
In 14 monthsYour track selection is just a predictive algorithm with a personality.
Human music selector with expensive headphones and ego issues.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect transitions for zero-energy crowds.
splat.you▸ BEATSYNC 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
drops the bass with perfect peak timing
You blend beats and curate dancefloor energy. Your career is basically just data matching for sweaty rooms.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still read the room and decide when to play the cheesiest song ever.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Your manual library organization is replaced by an API that pulls from trending global charts.
Month 3
A software plugin handles the sync so you do not have to touch the pitch fader.
Month 6
A vision sensor monitors the dancefloor to adjust tempo based on collective movement patterns.
Month 10
A dedicated digital kiosk rejects all requests that do not align with the established genre.
Month 14 · D-Day
The booth is fully autonomous and your presence is no longer required for the music.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.3%
Zero
Average beatmatch errors
Instant
Crate-digging speed
Nonexistent
Pretentious vinyl-only sneers
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to Spotify Premium.
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