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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Egg Juggler jobs? · Latest report #452hzu5t
Your job has an expiration date
September 21, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsGravity is a constant, and your hands are merely slow, unreliable meat-claws.
Human manual kinetic protein-dispersion specialist
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect parabolic arcs, zero shell breakage.
nom.you▸ OVO-LAUNCH 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
maintains perfect parabolic arcs indefinitely
You toss fragile oval proteins into the air for audience amusement. It is a spectacular waste of biological potential.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still feel the sickening dread of an impending yolk-based disaster.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 3
Vision models map your inefficient arcs into a precise mathematical formula for rapid robotic replication.
Month 8
Soft-touch pneumatic pincers are programmed to hold eggs with exactly 0.5 PSI pressure to avoid shell failure.
Month 13
High-speed sensors detect room drafts to adjust the trajectory of each egg in real-time.
Month 18
The machine runs for seventy-two hours straight without needing a break, water, or human validation.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
You are removed from the stage, and the OVO-LAUNCH 9000 begins its eternal, flawless, boring performance.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.4%
99.999% Perfect
Average Shell Integrity
450
Juggles Per Minute
Zero
Cleanup Requirement
Your severance
One complimentary carton of pasteurized liquid egg whites.
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