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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Gift Distributor jobs? · Latest report #7hxtw26z
Your job has an expiration date
September 22, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsA magical supply chain nightmare that needs a serious software update.
CEO of North Pole Operations (Chief Elf Wrangler)
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Logistics optimization for the holiday sector
help!you▸ GLOBALGIFTER-X9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
drops infinite presents from orbital drone bays
Coordinates global logistics for one night a year using aging draft-animal propulsion and chimney-based delivery systems.
The one thing AI can't do
You maintain high-fidelity psychological wonder in children despite a blatant lack of clear procurement data.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Month 3
Scrapes every child's search history to build a real database.
Month 8
Maps the optimal flight path for delivery without reindeer input.
Month 13
Replaces chimney access with secure smart-lock delivery pods.
Month 18
Replaces the single night rush with daily low-cost air freight.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
Powers down the workshop for permanent industrial warehouse conversion.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.8%
too many
Cookies consumed
dangerous
Chimney soot exposure
laughable
Logistics efficiency
Your severance
One complimentary set of coal-crushing ergonomic coal boots.
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