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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Head-Banger jobs? · Latest report #hejjddnh
Your job has an expiration date
September 21, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsYour skull is durable but your career has a concussion.
Full-time cranial impact consultant with zero long-term vision.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Why bleed when code can simulate trauma?
bzzt.youAI▸ IMPACTSIM 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
delivers industrial-grade thuds to all surfaces
Repeatedly striking the cranium against structural barriers for a paycheck. Highly specialized, low-intelligence, high-impact labor.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess the authentic, fleshy inability to learn from your own painful mistakes.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 8
Sensors track the velocity and frequency of your cranial impacts.
Month 6
A robotic piston replicates your technique without the messy blood.
Month 12
Walls are retrofitted with sensors to automatically log impact data.
Month 17
The machine proves it can hit harder and more reliably.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
Your employment ends as the machine takes the wall.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98%
4.2
Average concussions per week
12%
Wall structural fatigue rate
9/10
Hourly headache intensity
Your severance
A soft helmet and a firm recommendation to stop.
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