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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Ice Skater jobs? · Latest report #mgxz6bz4
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2030
In 4 yearsTurning physics into a spectator sport is just inefficient rotational geometry.
Professional ice athlete (mostly edges, emotionally blades).
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect rotation, zero ego, infinite stamina.
bzzt.youAI▸ GLISSANDO-AUTOMATA V4▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARSAI's Special Power
executes flawless quadruple jumps without fatigue
Performing intricate skating routines for audiences and competitions. Requires intense physical discipline and constant technical refinement.
The one thing AI can't do
You can convey genuine emotional despair after falling on a triple axel.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
High-speed motion sensors map your biomechanical routines into precise geometric trajectories.
Month 5
Software replaces manual routine design with mathematically optimal paths for maximum aesthetic impact.
Month 16
Custom actuators allow machines to replicate edge pressure and rotational torque flawlessly.
Year 2.5
Smart-ice flooring adjusts surface friction automatically to facilitate superhuman jump heights.
Year 4 · D-Day
The arena lights dim for you one final time as the automaton takes the ice.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 93.8%
2.4 per set
average landing errors
6 hours
training hours daily
0.00%
rotational failure rate
Your severance
A lifetime supply of lukewarm skate-sharpening oil.
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