Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Moped Rider jobs? · Latest report #m9zig59r
Your job has an expiration date
May 26, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsYour two-wheeled misery is just a navigation error waiting for satellites.
Professional lane-splitter and curb-hopper on two wheels.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Traffic is a bug, we are the patch.
sluurp.you▸ STREETSWIFT DROID V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters through lanes faster than you can
You weave through gridlocked traffic to deliver cold burritos and lukewarm coffee to impatient office dwellers.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still kick a car bumper when a driver cuts you off.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Traffic algorithms stop sending humans into the worst gridlock.
Month 5
Sensors and conveyor belts load cargo directly into pods.
Month 13
Self-balancing pods take over the most predictable urban routes.
Year 1.9
Insurance companies stop covering human riders to lower premiums.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
Your keys are turned in for a software license update.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.3%
92 percent
Cold food complaints
14 daily
Near-miss intersections
Maximum
Helmet hair level
Your severance
One free reflective vest and a broken phone mount.
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