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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Night Companion jobs? · Latest report #9ijwjrnj
Your job has an expiration date
October 18, 2042
In 16 yearsHumans are distractible, expensive, and require inconveniently long sleep cycles.
Human night-owl, moisture expert, and professional comfort provider.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Tactile presence without the biological limitations.
toast.youAI▸ NIGHTWARDEN-7▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 16 YEARSAI's Special Power
delivers moisture with perfect, cold precision
You provide emotional comfort and moisture application in the dark. A machine just needs a night-vision sensor.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense the specific, irrational depth of someone's fear in total silence.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
LiDAR sensors build a 3D map of the bedroom floor layout.
Month 16
Infrared cameras locate the client without needing a light source.
Year 4
Soft-touch applicator nozzles deliver moisturizer to specific skin zones.
Year 8
Silent-motor wheels allow navigation without triggering human wake-up response.
Year 16 · D-Day
The machine assumes full duty as the primary nocturnal presence.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.3%
15 per minute
Average blink rate
Zero objective units
Total nightly comfort
Infinite
Human emotional baggage
Your severance
One free jar of moisturizer and a nightlight.
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