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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Platonic Surrogate jobs? · Latest report #ge57vytq
Your job has an expiration date
October 12, 2066
In 40 yearsHuman warmth is currently an inefficient, biological, and legally high-risk heat exchange.
Voluntary human touch provider navigating biological paradoxes.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfected biological mimicry for tactile needs.
bzzt.youAI▸ BIOWARMTH-X9▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 40 YEARSAI's Special Power
emits perfectly calibrated pheromone signature
You facilitate skin-to-skin contact for physical, chemical, and biological regulatory requirements. Our infrastructure will eventually simulate this through non-biological tactile feedback systems.
The one thing AI can't do
You provide a genuine biological connection that no synthetic actuator can currently replicate perfectly.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 7
We analyze your tactile pressure profiles and warmth regulation techniques to build a sensory model.
Month 12
Sensory-array pods begin delivering localized heat and pressure to mimic human biological states.
Year 5
AI systems learn to adjust tactile feedback based on real-time client biometric stress sensors.
Year 14
Advanced predictive algorithms simulate supportive presence through precise, adaptive physical responses.
Year 40 · D-Day
Biological input is decommissioned in favor of zero-risk, high-fidelity tactile pods.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92%
0.01C
Thermal Drift Variance
94%
Oxytocin Mimicry Rate
Zero
Human Liability Index
Your severance
A warm blanket and a digital apology.
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