Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Shower Technician jobs? · Latest report #hzkg8vdc
Your job has an expiration date
November 21, 2026
In 4 weeksWater management is complex; your organic form remains bafflingly inefficient.
Sentient biological organism in a wet environment.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Optimal hydration, minimal human input.
squeeze.you▸ HYDROSCRUB-X▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 WEEKSAI's Special Power
calibrates water pressure to your existential dread
You manage temperature gradients and moisture application for personal hygiene. It is a biological maintenance requirement that defies standard industrial optimization.
The one thing AI can't do
You retain the unique ability to contemplate your entire existence while the water runs cold.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 1
IoT valves begin tracking your water usage patterns for peak efficiency.
Day 2
Soap delivery systems automate dosage to prevent excessive consumption.
Day 3
AI-managed thermostats prevent you from choosing incorrect temperature profiles.
Day 13
Modular pods replace open-style showers to contain humidity within optimal ranges.
Week 4 · D-Day
You are optimized into a fully automated sanitization cycle.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
0.1 degrees
Thermal variance
99 percent
Soap efficiency
Maximum
Hygienic output
Your severance
A towel and the hope for better plumbing.
Discussion
