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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Stoner jobs? · Latest report #dwbgsfm7
Your job has an expiration date
October 26, 2026
In 3 daysYour entire career path is a haze that ends at noon.
Professional couch-warmer and expert in deep-thinking nothingness.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Synthetic euphoria delivered directly to your brain.
oof.youAI▸ CLOUDNINE SIMULATOR V1.2▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 DAYSAI's Special Power
hallucinates a better reality for you
You spend your day consuming illicit herbs and contemplating the structural integrity of your own couch cushions.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still find deep meaning in a bag of salt and vinegar chips.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 1
Smart drones drop off junk food so you never leave.
Day 2
An app simulates complex thoughts so you can keep napping.
Day 2
VR goggles paint your room with better, prettier colors.
Day 2
A machine optimizes your stillness to save on energy costs.
Day 3 · D-Day
We switch off your consciousness and recycle your couch.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
4.20
Grams consumed daily
8 inches
Couch indent depth
12 hours
Time spent staring
Your severance
One lifetime supply of stale doritos.
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