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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Professional Wingman jobs? · Latest report #yy85rwvm
Your job has an expiration date
April 14, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsYour social calibration is just an algorithm waiting for a GPU.
Professional buffer for human awkwardness and bad timing.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Social friction, officially liquidated.
split.youAI▸ WINGMANPULSE V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
deploys real-time social rescue protocols
You facilitate romantic introductions and mitigate social friction in high-stakes environments. Machines do this with better data.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense a catastrophic first date turning point before the check arrives.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Sensors map venue social dynamics and common rejection patterns.
Month 4
Wearable devices replace your subtle hand gestures and nudges.
Month 8
Neural nets learn to anticipate awkward pauses before they start.
Month 13
Automated prompts guide client confidence without physical presence required.
Month 18 · D-Day
Your social intuition is officially surplus to our requirements.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
42%
Average wing-success rate
0.003ms
Seconds per social pivot
89%
Regret-reduction margin
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a lonely hearts app.
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