Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Program Delivery Manager jobs? · Latest report #6j4esu48
Your job has an expiration date
July 4, 2028
In 1 year, 8 monthsTurning your vague status updates into efficient, error-free dead-ends.
Professional cat-herder of developers who hate meetings.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Ending your status meetings permanently.
help!youAI▸ SYNCMASTER PRO V9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 8 MONTHSAI's Special Power
automates your status report emails
You chase Jira tickets and beg teams for status updates. Our software does it without the fake concern.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a team is lying to you about the project status.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors pull updates directly from code repos.
Month 5
The system reassigns tasks based on actual velocity.
Month 10
Dashboard updates replace your daily team chatter.
Month 15
AI slides generate themselves based on real data.
Month 20 · D-Day
Your access is revoked and the bot takes over.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.4%
12/hour
Average Slack ping frequency
15 hours/week
Time spent in useless standups
42%
Percentage of red flags ignored
Your severance
A one-month subscription to a meditation app.
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