Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Project Portfolio Manager jobs? · Latest report #qpqf5r57
Your job has an expiration date
May 24, 2028
In 1 year, 7 monthsYou track resource utilization while software does the actual work anyway.
Professional spreadsheet builder and professional meeting inviter.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated resource allocation for non-human teams.






nom.you▸ PORTFOLIOCORE V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
rebalances team capacity every fifteen minutes
You shuffle Jira tickets and manage project roadmaps to ensure teams hit arbitrary quarterly milestone targets.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still awkwardly negotiate scope with humans who don't want to admit they're wrong.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Software scrapes Jira data to generate your weekly status slides.
Month 4
Algorithms begin predicting team capacity based on historical output metrics.
Month 10
The software automatically shifts tickets between developers without human intervention.
Month 15
Virtual agents handle stakeholder questions about project delays automatically.
Month 19 · D-Day
The project management interface deletes your credentials permanently.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.4%
Optimized
Jira ticket velocity
Zeroed
Roadmap drift rate
Instant
Stakeholder update latency
Your severance
One free subscription to a project management masterclass.
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