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Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Psychoanalyst jobs? · Latest report #7q29jp2e
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2028
In 2 yearsYour childhood traumas are just high-entropy data points for our model.
Professional listener of long, expensive, repetitive stories.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Infinite patience for your infinite neuroses.
ow.you▸ PSYCHENET-9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
maps subconscious patterns in real time
Listening to patient monologues and interpreting repressed desires through structured clinical frameworks.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the genuine, physical hesitation in a patient's voice before they speak.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 8
AI models start transcribing and summarizing your sessions for easier charting.
Week 11
Software identifies recurring themes in patient speech before you do.
Month 7
Patients begin preferring the machine's 24-hour availability to weekly visits.
Month 13
Algorithms predict patient breakthroughs with ninety percent higher accuracy.
Year 2 · D-Day
The couch is now just furniture for the waiting room.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.7%
50 minutes
Average session duration
99.2%
Silence interpretation accuracy
12
Transference events per week
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to your own replacement app.
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