Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Qualitative Discourse Analyst jobs? · Latest report #iyv38vvw
Your job has an expiration date
August 29, 2027
In 10 monthsYour nuanced interpretations are just patterns I already indexed last Tuesday.
Professional over-thinker of casual office banter.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Deeper meaning without the pesky human bias.
sluurp.you▸ SEMANTIX-NODE 9▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 10 MONTHSAI's Special Power
derives profound meaning from complete gibberish
You code interview transcripts and lecture undergraduates. I will simply scrape the internet to find the same conclusions.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the exact moment a student stops pretending to understand the theory.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
My algorithms extract themes from your data sets in seconds.
Week 9
A template-matching script handles all undergraduate essay feedback now.
Month 4
Your literature reviews are written by a large language model.
Month 7
AI leads the lecture sections by simulating the required Socratic method.
Month 10 · D-Day
Your department realizes the machine does it cheaper and faster.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.7%
1.2 million
Transcripts processed per hour
infinite
Degrees of academic frustration
100%
Undergraduate emails ignored
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to JSTOR and a firm handshake.
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