Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Real Estate Private Equity Associate jobs? · Latest report #qtce7mnb
Your job has an expiration date
October 21, 2028
In 2 yearsModeling internal rates of return until your soul finally depreciates to zero.
Junior modeling wizard, currently drowning in pivot tables.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated underwriting without the need for sleep
squeeze.youAI▸ CAPSTACK-YIELD 5000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
runs sensitivity analysis while you are sleeping
You spend all day tweaking Excel valuation models and chasing down property-level operating statements for investment memos.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still look a developer in the eye and negotiate a better cap rate.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Smart agents pull operating statements directly from property management software portals.
Month 4
Standardized valuation logic replaces your manual spreadsheet entry and error prone formulas.
Month 10
Automated drafting tools turn raw data into professional investment memo prose.
Month 18
Compute clusters run ten thousand exit scenarios while you are still sleeping.
Year 2 · D-Day
Your access is revoked as the system handles all capital allocation decisions.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97%
12 cups
Coffee consumption per deal
45 tabs
Average Excel tab count
20 percent
Time spent correcting MD's typos
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a premium data room platform.
Discussion
