Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Relationship Consultant jobs? · Latest report #3bwpp4j4
Your job has an expiration date
July 24, 2028
In 1 year, 9 monthsPredicting your breakup with 99% accuracy before you even know it.
Professional listener for people paying to be heard.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Neutral logic for messy human feelings.
blub.you▸ HEARTSYNC PROCESSOR V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 9 MONTHSAI's Special Power
deconstructs your marriage arguments into raw data
You listen to people's emotional baggage and suggest communication habits to fix their failing partnerships.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect a lingering silence in a room that a sensor ignores.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 5
Sensors and chat logs track every word spoken between partners.
Month 4
A model identifies the exact triggers for every recurring argument.
Month 9
The AI generates perfectly calibrated responses to emotional outbursts.
Month 15
Software predicts the outcome of every suggested conflict resolution tactic.
Month 21 · D-Day
The machine delivers the breakup news with total clinical precision.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.4%
4.2 seconds
Average breakup prediction speed
Infinite iterations
Empathy simulation depth
100 percent
Human error rate in advice
Your severance
A box of tissues and a cold hard truth.
Discussion
