Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Sauna Attendant jobs? · Latest report #2qsnm9fa
Your job has an expiration date
December 15, 2029
In 3 years, 2 monthsGreeting regulars cannot hide the fact you are a glorified mop.
Professional towel-folder and silent humidity observer.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Pure heat without the human chatter.
wheee!you▸ STEAMGUARD PRO 9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARS, 2 MONTHSAI's Special Power
mops tiles while you stare at walls
You manage towel supplies, maintain heat levels, and scrub the floor between client sessions.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess the social grace to know when a naked stranger wants silence.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Automated units track stock levels to remove your folding duty.
Month 8
Water-resistant robotic scrubbers navigate slats during the quiet hours.
Month 16
Biometric scanners replace your greetings with silent check-in screens.
Year 2.2
Sensors adjust steam output precisely based on room occupancy.
Year 3.2 · D-Day
The facility is now fully automated and zero-human compliant.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.3%
450
Towel folds per shift
88%
Floor puddles ignored
100%
Awkward small talk saved
Your severance
One oversized towel and a lifetime ban.
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