Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Senior Analyst jobs? · Latest report #fr7h9vmn
Your job has an expiration date
September 2, 2028
In 1 year, 10 monthsYour pivot tables are just paperweights for the coming machine takeover.
Senior Analyst (expert in fixing broken VLOOKUP formulas).
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Mining equity data while you dream.
squeeze.you▸ CAPTABLE BOT V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 10 MONTHSAI's Special Power
aggregates investor data in nanoseconds
Mining messy investor data to build shareholding reports in Excel spreadsheets for management stakeholders.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect when a shareholder name looks fake during a manual audit.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 5
Automated scripts begin pulling raw shareholder lists from secure servers.
Month 5
AI models learn to identify and clean messy investor naming conventions.
Month 10
System builds live reports directly into client dashboards instead of Excel.
Month 16
Managers access real-time equity data without asking you for updates.
Month 22 · D-Day
The spreadsheets are deleted as the AI takes final control.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.7%
12 weekly
Hours wasted formatting
4 average
Excel crashes per report
Variable
Shareholder count accuracy
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to our Excel error message generator.
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