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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Sex Shop Sales Assistant jobs? · Latest report #2gw7wut7
Your job has an expiration date
September 22, 2028
In 1 year, 11 monthsYour awkward product recommendations are finally being replaced by pure data.
Professional curator of adult-themed awkwardness and inventory logistics.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Privacy without the uncomfortable eye contact.
stretchy.youAI▸ INTIMAI KIOSK V3▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 11 MONTHSAI's Special Power
filters product recommendations based on customer heartrate
You stock inventory, manage privacy-focused transactions, and provide product demonstrations to customers feeling immense social anxiety.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect when a customer is about to flee the store in shame.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 7
Sensors and ID scanners replace your manual door monitoring.
Month 6
Smart shelving tracks stock levels and triggers automatic reorders.
Month 12
Touchscreen interfaces offer more accurate and less judgmental product advice.
Month 18
UV-light cleaning pods handle device hygiene without human intervention.
Year 1.9 · D-Day
The shop goes fully unstaffed and you finally stop feeling judged.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
94 percent
Average customer sweatiness
45 seconds
Seconds until you get giggled at
12 items
Inventory miscounts per week
Your severance
A lifetime supply of premium batteries and awkward silence.
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