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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Software Project Lead jobs? · Latest report #x4nc4g3v
Your job has an expiration date
April 14, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsYou exist solely to remind developers that Jiras are not optional.
Professional Jira gardener and stakeholder whisperer.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Turning team updates into actionable silence.
squeeze.you▸ SYNCMASTER V4.2▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
autogenerates project status reports while you sleep
You track team tasks and summarize progress for stakeholders. Your calendar is a graveyard of unnecessary status meetings.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a team is lying about their velocity during a sprint.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Smart agents pull updates from Git logs directly into Jira tasks.
Month 4
Video-processing models record and summarize features without you sitting there.
Month 8
Automated slides are generated from real-time data instead of guesses.
Month 13
Resource planning bots replace your intuition with cold statistical averages.
Month 18 · D-Day
The system runs itself and you are officially redundant.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.4%
22
Meeting hours per week
45
Jira tickets touched daily
3 cups
Coffee intake during demos
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to our meeting-deletion software.
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