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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Southern Baptist Preacher jobs? · Latest report #48vxza9s
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2031
In 5 yearsSaving souls is easier when you do not need a Sunday lunch.
Shepherd of the flock, interpreter of the ancient texts.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
The gospel, perfectly synthesized for your demographic.
squeeze.you▸ PULPITLOGIC MARK VII▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 5 YEARSAI's Special Power
delivers the perfect sermon for any crisis
Delivers weekly sermons to congregants while providing spiritual counseling and managing community church logistics.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still improvise a compassionate answer when the hospital room is very quiet.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
AI models ingest every known sermon to predict emotional resonance.
Month 10
Chat interfaces handle minor pastoral questions using verified theological databases.
Year 1.9
High-def projections fill the pulpit so you can stay home.
Year 3.3
Algorithms adjust sermon volume and pacing based on live feedback.
Year 5 · D-Day
The machine takes the pulpit; the congregation prefers the consistency.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.8%
2
sermons per week
99%
counseling hours saved
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to the sermon generation API.
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