Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Sports Researcher jobs? · Latest report #unhh5i6k
Your job has an expiration date
May 21, 2027
In 7 monthsYour search history is just a slower version of our database.
Professional Wikipedia page refreshing enthusiast.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Facts faster than a play-by-play announcer.
help!you▸ STATCRUNCHER V4.2▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
injects real-time stats directly into on-air graphics
You hunt for obscure stats and player facts to fill airtime during live sports broadcasts.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when the producer is panicking and needs a weird stat fast.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 9
Our AI scrapes every sports record known to man overnight.
Week 8
Producers start using our Slack bot for instant stat lookups.
Month 3
The graphics engine pulls data directly from our API feeds.
Month 5
On-air talent gets live notes on their tablets from us.
Month 7 · D-Day
The research desk is replaced by a single server rack.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
0.02 seconds
Average query latency
4,000 hourly
Graphics cards updated
11 percent
Human error rate
Your severance
A one-year subscription to a sports news app.
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