Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Statistics Professor jobs? · Latest report #ienjdwxx
Your job has an expiration date
October 26, 2029
In 3 yearsYour p-values are significant, but your lecture delivery is statistically zero.
Tenure-tracked theorist in a world of big data.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Deduction without the tenure-track ego.









toast.you▸ QUANTLEARNER-9▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARSAI's Special Power
derives infinite proofs without needing sleep
You interpret complex data models for students and derive new statistical proofs on chalkboards.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a student is lying about the dog eating their homework.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 6
AI writes your course outlines based on popular online lecture trends.
Month 6
Optical scanners and logic-parsers grade all exams instantly.
Month 13
Students ask an LLM questions instead of attending office hours.
Month 22
Algorithms generate and critique research papers faster than you can.
Year 3 · D-Day
The department replaces your lectures with high-fidelity pre-recorded simulations.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
4:1
Coffee-to-Equation ratio
68 percent
Students sleeping
0.05 probability
Meaningful research
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to peer-reviewed digital journals.
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