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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Student Affairs Leader jobs? · Latest report #ztnc2udg
Your job has an expiration date
April 15, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsConverting your empathy into structured student retention spreadsheets.
Professional cat-herder for tuition-paying young adults.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated student success at zero overhead.
split.you▸ ACADEMIABOT PRO V3▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
predicts dropouts before they apply
You juggle student crisis management, campus programming, and retention metrics. The institution relies on your manual reporting.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect a student's distress through a closed door by their specific walk.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
An AI agent starts drafting your standard student outreach emails.
Month 4
All your student data moves into a centralized predictive model.
Month 8
Virtual bots chair your committees and document all decisions.
Month 13
Algorithms handle all disciplinary tickets and route them to resolution.
Month 18 · D-Day
The system assumes full control of the entire campus experience.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.4%
142
emails answered per day
0.4%
meaningful student interactions
99.2%
retention algorithm accuracy
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to our sentiment analysis platform.
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