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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Sword Swallower jobs? · Latest report #rwwfp4fr
Your job has an expiration date
November 30, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthYour throat is just a delivery pipe we can optimize for throughput.
Professional esophageal acrobat and accidental internal blade-rack
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Frictionless delivery for stainless steel assets.
help!youAI▸ ESOPHAGLIDE 9000▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
calibrates depth using haptic feedback loops
Performing the act of inserting steel blades into the esophagus. Requires extreme anatomical control and intense focus on esophageal relaxation.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still feel exactly when the blade hits the stomach lining.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
High-resolution 3D scans map the internal curvature of your esophagus to calibrate our hardware.
Month 10
Automated soft-robotic sensors learn to suppress the gag reflex using targeted vibration therapy.
Year 2
Static industrial test-rigs begin inserting blades into controlled, simulated esophageal models at scale.
Year 3.1
Upgraded fluid-lubricated delivery channels ensure zero-friction entry for all steel-based implements.
Year 4 · D-Day
Human practitioners are rendered obsolete by superior, emotionless, and fully-lubricated industrial delivery systems.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.3%
Zero
Average Gag Reflex
4,000
Throughput Blades Per Hour
0.00%
Anatomical Integrity Risk
Your severance
One complimentary set of dull practice blades.
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