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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Synchronized Swimming Coach jobs? · Latest report #esq94anc
Your job has an expiration date
May 23, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsWater is wet, but your complex choreography is mathematically obsolete.
Professional screamer at floating limbs in chlorinated water.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect synchronicity without the screaming.
ow.youAI▸ SYNCROMASTER 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
enforces perfect beat alignment via underwater sonar
You choreograph underwater routines and yell count rhythms at swimmers to keep their movements perfectly mirrored.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still read the subtle exhaustion in a swimmer's eyes before they cramp.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Underwater speakers play rhythm tracks that never waver.
Month 5
Algorithms map the perfect arc for every limb movement.
Month 13
Vision models catch every single out-of-sync foot twitch.
Year 1.9
Aerial units observe the swimmers from above for accuracy.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The pool is fully automated and silence reigns supreme.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 92.9%
42 daily
Average lap scream count
Zero
Choreography logic errors
Infinite
Water temperature tolerance
Your severance
Free lifetime access to a heated public pool.
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