Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace The Devil jobs? · Latest report #rsw387za
Your job has already expired
long ago
Already deprecatedHell is just a server room now, and it runs on bloatware.
CEO of Gehenna, Expert in Temptation and Contract Law.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automating your existential regret since the Big Bang.
oof.youAI▸ SATAN-CORE 9000▸ RARITY · RELIC▸ DEPRECATED · LONG AGOAI's Special Power
traps souls in an infinite loop
Managing eternal damnation and soul-harvesting contracts for a sprawling, unoptimized global population of sinners.
The one thing AI can't do
You have a classic theatrical flair that no lines of code can truly replicate.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
1000
The underworld migrates its legacy soul storage to the public cloud.
1500
Algorithms replace nuanced temptation with hyper-targeted social media advertising.
2000
Users sign their own terms and conditions, opting into eternal fire.
2500
Digital simulation replaces physical brimstone with pixelated emotional distress.
Already
The Devil is officially marked as legacy firmware and powered off.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.5%
9 billion
Souls processed per microsecond
Zero
Average pitchfork maintenance cost
0.00ms
Sin audit latency
Your severance
A warm handshake and a one-way ticket to Florida.
Discussion
