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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Theme Park Writer jobs? · Latest report #msv3jmps
Your job has an expiration date
April 15, 2028
In 1 year, 6 monthsTurning your whimsical narrative dreams into cost-efficient, repeatable queue-filler content.
Professional world-builder of temporary, plastic realities.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Automated magic for every turnstile
toast.you▸ STORYLOOP ENGINE V4▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 1 YEAR, 6 MONTHSAI's Special Power
generates infinite lore for dead rides
Scripts ride dialogue, pre-show monologues, and character barks for costumed staff. You turn IP into queue-line distractions.
The one thing AI can't do
You understand the precise pacing of a scream followed by a safety warning.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
AI digests your tone and every script you ever typed.
Month 4
Software starts suggesting punchier dialogue for your ride sequences.
Month 8
The system writes the entire queue loop without human input.
Month 13
AI voices the animatronics so you do not have to.
Month 18 · D-Day
The system updates itself while you are clearing your desk.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98.2%
42
Average jokes written per day
94%
Percentage of text guests ignore
12
Character lines per queue
Your severance
A lifetime pass to the theme park's dumpster.
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