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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Tuba Player jobs? · Latest report #35bx68k3
Your job has an expiration date
December 15, 2029
In 3 years, 2 monthsConverting lung capacity into a liability one low-frequency vibration at a time.
Professional low-frequency wind manipulator and mouthpiece enthusiast.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect intonation without the need for oxygen.
bzzt.you▸ BASSPULSE SYNTH-O-MATIC 9000▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 3 YEARS, 2 MONTHSAI's Special Power
projects perfect bass frequencies into the floor
You manipulate brass valves and breath pressure to produce subsonic vibrations. Your primary value is physical presence in a pit or stage ensemble.
The one thing AI can't do
You alone understand the specific, damp smell of a brass instrument after a long rehearsal.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Sensors map the precise resonance of your performance space to eliminate need for manual tuning.
Month 4
Neural networks synthesize your exact timbre and valve-clacking transients into a flawless output stream.
Month 15
High-fidelity transducer arrays replace your physical presence with perfect, distortion-free sub-bass waves.
Year 2.2
Robotic gantry systems move projection units to simulate the exact visual presence of a musician.
Year 3.2 · D-Day
The orchestra replaces your seat with a permanent, maintenance-free digital low-end infrastructure.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.1%
98 percent
Tuba-related lung strain
12 percent
Human error in low-B
0.002ms
Optimal output latency
Your severance
One lifetime supply of heavy-duty valve oil.
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