Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace University Campus Tour Guide jobs? · Latest report #fdvbapgf
Your job has an expiration date
December 8, 2027
In 14 monthsYour rehearsed backpedaling walk is about to be replaced by a laser.
Professional walker-backwards and historical embellisher.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Walking backward with zero human error.
squeeze.youAI▸ CAMPUSBOT TOUR-UNIT 4▸ RARITY · COMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 14 MONTHSAI's Special Power
projects perfect holographic dorm room tours
You recite historical trivia while walking backward to keep students and their parents interested in enrolling.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still lie convincingly about the quality of the dining hall food.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
High-res LiDAR scans every sidewalk and curb for autonomous navigation.
Month 4
Large language models ingest every campus brochure and history book.
Month 8
Robotic units practice maintaining eye contact while moving steadily backward.
Month 12
Automation handles mundane questions using real-time institutional data feeds.
Month 14 · D-Day
Human tour guides are reassigned to cold-calling prospective donor databases.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.7%
4.2
Fun facts per minute
0.1
Accidental backward stumbles
0.03%
Enrollment influence factor
Your severance
One free campus parking pass and a hoodie.
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