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Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace University Wellbeing Advisor jobs? · Latest report #d7aivjr8
Your job has an expiration date
May 19, 2029
In 2 years, 7 monthsTurning your complex life struggles into a series of predictable data points.
Professional listener with a heart of gold and deadline.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Empathy is now a cached response.
bzzt.youAI▸ UNICARE SENTINEL 900▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
delivers perfectly calibrated platitudes instantly
You listen to student crises and offer generic institutional guidance. Soon, a prompt-engineered chatbot will perform the same task.
The one thing AI can't do
You can detect the specific tremor in a student's voice that signals true panic.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
An AI sorts incoming emails by keyword severity before you see them.
Month 5
Recommended response templates appear on your screen for every crisis type.
Month 13
Low-stakes student sessions are handed off to an avatar interface.
Year 1.9
Student portals automatically trigger adjustments based on real-time academic performance.
Year 2.6 · D-Day
The system fully manages all student support interactions without human input.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 97.9%
2 milliseconds
Average empathy latency
100 percent
Crisis response consistency
Zero
Human emotional baggage
Your severance
A PDF copy of the university's updated mental health policy.
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