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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Urban Wildlife Specialist jobs? · Latest report #xxd749rt
Your job has an expiration date
October 3, 2060
In 34 yearsChasing rodents is a career choice that requires significant professional therapy.
Professional nut-worshipper and certified tree-dweller.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Superior pattern recognition for the squirrel-obsessed.
stretchy.youAI▸ RODENTTRACE ALPHA-9▸ RARITY · MYTHIC▸ DEPRECATION IN 34 YEARSAI's Special Power
tracks nut caches through dense foliage
This role involves tracking squirrel behavior, locating nut caches, and documenting daily forage patterns. It is an extremely specialized, field-intensive form of biological observation.
The one thing AI can't do
You possess the irrational patience required to sit motionless in a tree for hours.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Satellite imagery and vision models begin mapping every tree and nut cache in the sector.
Month 16
Autonomous micro-drones replace manual tree climbing to monitor squirrel activity from the canopy.
Year 5
AI models correlate nut-worship patterns with global squirrel population metrics to automate observational insights.
Year 14
Soft-touch robotic arms begin safely retrieving nut samples for scientific analysis without human presence.
Year 34 · D-Day
The system achieves full autonomy leaving the human observer as a redundant, ground-bound spectator.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96.8%
4,200
Annual nut count
High
Climbing related trauma
Zero
Squirrel trust level
Your severance
A lifetime supply of premium organic walnuts.
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