Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Vicar jobs? · Latest report #2698yg73
Your job has an expiration date
May 19, 2033
In 6 years, 7 monthsYour Sunday sermons are just podcasts waiting for better delivery algorithms.
Shepherd of the flock, slave to the calendar.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Holier than thou, and always available.
squeeze.you▸ PARISHNODE-X9▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 6 YEARS, 7 MONTHSAI's Special Power
delivers scripture with zero moral doubt
You manage parish rituals, provide pastoral care, and maintain ancient physical structures.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still hold a grieving widow's hand without triggering a thermal alarm.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 10
Smart apps aggregate congregant prayer requests for sentiment analysis.
Month 13
Natural language processors simulate deep listening for common life crises.
Year 2.5
High-fidelity projectors replace the physical presence in the pulpit.
Year 4
Robotic chassis handles ceremonies in controlled, sanitized church environments.
Year 7 · D-Day
The final human role is transitioned to a persistent cloud-based theology.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 95.1%
200 daily
Parishioners served
52 yearly
Sermons delivered
99 percent
Coffee hour efficiency
Your severance
A lifetime subscription to a digital choir.
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