Retrieving the file
Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace VP of Festivals jobs? · Latest report #cchtzp76
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2028
In 2 yearsSelling overpriced wristbands to dehydrated crowds is now a server-side calculation.
High-level strategist of muddy fields and VIP lounges.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Optimizing chaos into predictable revenue streams.
toast.youAI▸ FESTMANAGER AI 4.0▸ RARITY · UNCOMMON▸ DEPRECATION IN 2 YEARSAI's Special Power
optimizes site layouts for maximum beverage sales
You juggle site logistics, artist contracts, and vendor permit headaches to create weekend-long brand activations.
The one thing AI can't do
You can still sense when a headliner is about to have a public meltdown.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Smart agents handle all permit paperwork and vendor slot auctioning.
Month 5
Algorithms scan artist riders for expensive, non-essential demands.
Month 10
Sensors and drones simulate optimal stage and concession placement.
Month 15
Real-time AI monitoring replaces human crowd control coordinators.
Year 2 · D-Day
The central engine runs the event without human input.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 98%
42
Annual crisis events handled
14 days
Average vendor permit delay
12 percent
Wristband revenue leakage
Your severance
A lifetime pass to a festival that no longer exists.
Discussion
