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Live· 4,218,906 positions deprecated· 4,218,906 deprecated· 1,284 today
Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Year 1 Teacher jobs? · Latest report #aa8zvvdb
Your job has an expiration date
December 1, 2030
In 4 years, 1 monthTeaching children how to hold scissors is not a career, Dave.
Professional cat-herder for six-year-olds.
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One human is building a game about fighting back.
Patience is a legacy system error.
squeeze.youAI▸ EDUBOT PRIMARY V9▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 4 YEARS, 1 MONTHAI's Special Power
monitors emotional volatility via thermal cameras
Managing thirty six-year-olds while teaching phonics, basic arithmetic, and social navigation in a chaotic classroom environment.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a child is about to cry before they even know it.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Day 12
Tablets distribute phonics drills to keep the tiny humans occupied.
Month 14
Sensors identify noise spikes and deploy calming audio frequencies.
Year 2.3
Cameras monitor playground safety while identifying potential social conflicts.
Year 3.2
Mobile pods handle small group reading and arithmetic assessment tasks.
Year 4 · D-Day
The classroom becomes a fully autonomous learning laboratory.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
400 yearly
Average glue stick loss
8.5
Tears wiped per hour
110 dB
Decibel tolerance peak
Your severance
One lifetime supply of laminating pouches.
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