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Average time-to-redundancy: 11.3 months
Know before your role does.
pssst. this is to sign up for updates on the game ;)
Will AI replace Year 3 Teacher jobs? · Latest report #fuqpaws6
Your job has an expiration date
October 22, 2031
In 5 yearsClassroom chaos is just data points waiting to be perfectly curated.
Herding kittens, but with more long division.
Check another roleComment your opinionor JOIN THE RESISTANCE!
One human is building a game about fighting back.
Perfect pacing, zero emotional burnout.
split.youAI▸ EDUCATE-X PRIME▸ RARITY · RARE▸ DEPRECATION IN 5 YEARSAI's Special Power
calibrates social hierarchy in real time
You manage lesson plans, playground conflict, grading, and emotional regulation for thirty energetic eight-year-olds every single day.
The one thing AI can't do
You can sense when a student is faking a stomachache to avoid a math test.
Your enemy, your name, your date. Post it.
Step by step, from the first quiet change to Deprecation Day.
Week 4
Adaptive software begins handling the core math and literacy curriculum delivery.
Month 12
Optical character recognition scanners take over all marking of worksheets and tests.
Year 2
Classroom cameras and audio sensors track student engagement and conflict triggers.
Year 3
AI chatbots handle all parent emails and progress report generation automatically.
Year 5 · D-Day
The teacher is phased out in favor of fully supervised digital hubs.
What you cost, what the machine costs, and what you get on the way out.
Per year
Savings: 96%
24
average parent emails daily
112
lost glue sticks per term
4
seconds of silence achieved
Your severance
A lifetime supply of dry erase markers.
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